Hobby-ists vs. Productive-ists

Hot take: It’s cool to be into things. 

My colleague casually shared this sentiment the other day as we walked around campus. To her, it was obvious; to me, it felt revolutionary. It took me a second to process what she said but then I found myself nodding along enthusiastically as I thought about how cool it is to be drawn in by someone’s enthusiasm for a thing they’re into.

My colleague is one of those people, an extreme hobbyist who is very much into “things”. 

I am a productive-ist who is very much into doing things that are, well, productive. 

She’s had hobbies since she can remember, like knitting, sketching, and reading, and she continues to add new hobbies like a cookbook club where the group selects a cookbook and everyone makes a different recipe from it and then brings their dishes to the meetup – so cool!

I’ve never had hobbies. 

I’m envious and fascinated by people who have them. Those people seem to have an endless and seemingly effortless supply of things to occupy their time. 

My husband – also a hobbyist – often hounds me to stop trying to be productive all the time and just enjoy my time, to chill out and relax. But I can’t do it. I don’t know how. 

Eventually, I heard his refrain so often that I decided to stop ignoring him and actually listen. I tried to chill out the best way I could think of: I forced myself to sit on the porch and do absolutely nothing for five minutes. That’s how you chill out, right?

It was excruciating, uncomfortable, and such a waste of time. Thoughts and ideas swirled in my head of a million different things I could do instead: unload the dishwasher, pick up toys, put laundry away, hang a picture that’s been sitting on the floor of my room for ages, clean the windows, organize my sock drawer. 

The five minutes ended and I realized I had a problem: I had no chill. Why did my husband have to be right??

I was disappointed that I couldn’t sit for five minutes without my never-ending to-do list creeping into my head. I realized I didn’t want to live life just to get stuff done. I wanted to enjoy my time.  So, I started searching for a hobby. 

My first thought was to Google: how to find a hobby. The results were uninspiring: Think about your interests, What did you like to do as a kid? Here are 5 steps to find a hobby that’s right for you. 

None of them helped. I didn’t know what interested me because I spent my time getting stuff done, not introspecting about my interests. 

Then COVID hit and I had more time than I knew what to do with. It didn’t take me long to get all of my to-dos done so I filled my time watching TV and scrolling social media.

One night when I was sick of searching Netflix for the next show to watch after powering through Atypical, Workin’ Moms, Brooklyn Nine-Nine, Upload, Emily in Paris… the list goes on, I sat on my couch and stared at the wall. My eyes focused on a painting of my dogs hanging there. I painted it years ago at a paint and sip place and really enjoyed it. A thought popped into my head: maybe painting could be my hobby.

My paint and sip painting of my dogs, Albert and Lucy

I wasn’t sure how to start but then I remembered an ad I saw on Instagram about a paint by numbers kit – turns out my doom scrolling wasn’t a complete waste of time. 

I ordered a customized paint by numbers kit using a photo of my favorite tea mug and a vase of yellow forsythia flowers cut from my yard. When the kit arrived, I unrolled the canvas, popped open the paints, and got to work. My mind focused on painting each shape and section instead of my never-ending to-do list. I felt happy and relaxed. I looked at the clock and two hours had passed but it felt like only a few minutes. How was that possible? 

I got lost in something for the pure enjoyment of it rather than doing something exclusively for the end result – that’s cool.

My paint by numbers of my favorite tea mug and a vase of forsythia

It’s been a few years since then and now I’ve painted a handful of paint by number kits and have discovered new hobbies like birding, gardening, reading, listening to podcasts, and, most recently, writing. 

I’ve since learned that making space to do things I enjoy actually helps me be more productive overall. I’m no longer constantly burning the candle on both ends: being productive all day at work and then being productive all evening at home. Hobbies help me enjoy my time, which gives my brain a break so that when I eventually return to my never-ending to-do list, I can do it with renewed energy.

Although my hobbies are intrinsically for me, I’ve discovered something strange: as I share my experiences through my writing, people are interested in the things I do.

A friend will ask about a book I’m reading

A colleague will inquire if I’ve checked on the blue jays nesting outside our office window

A neighbor will stop by to see how our garden is doing

It’s weird and wonderful to enjoy something and have someone ask about it. Each time it happens, I find myself answering enthusiastically and then I take a second to process how cool it is that now I have things I’m into and can share my enthusiasm about them.

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Thanks to

Hesam Panahi

,

Emma Dorge

, and

Karena

for being so cool and giving me feedback on my writing.